Showing posts with label Adversity. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Adversity. Show all posts

Dec 29, 2017

Looking forward to 2018

I'm not gonna lie.  I was done with 2017 by about January 27th. And March 12th. And I'm pretty sure I begged for 2018 about 37 1/2 times throughout the year. Somehow I survived with all my fingers and toes still attached, though some family members didn't kept all their body parts. 

I've spent years telling myself, "As soon as I get through this, I'll (insert goal here)."  My great epiphany of 2017 was that life is not going to settle down for me. This is my normal and I'd better figure out some way to cope and move forward.  If things haven't settled down after seven years, they're not going to settle down. 

So I pulled up my big girl panties until I had a wedgie, pulled back my shoulders, and decided to push onward.

This year, I refuse to look back. Only forward.  Goals are set and excitement is building.  Instead of enduring the torrential downpour, I choose to dance in the rain, puddle-jump to my heart's content, marvel at the lightening shooting across the sky, and howl with the thunder as it vibrates through my bones.

No matter what life throws at you, I hope I find you dancing in the rain with me - it's always more fun when you have someone to splash with. May your new year be amazing and filled with wonder.

Happy New Year!


Dec 7, 2017

An Invitation to Grow

by Kari Diane Pike

About three and a half years ago, our youngest son Levi and our niece Megan participated in a cultural celebration to commemorate the dedication of the Gilbert Arizona temple for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Several hundred youth and their leaders rehearsed in dry, asthma-attack-inducing, dusty conditions and then performed as icy rain poured down from the sky. Megan described the event as the most horrible, magnificent experience she had ever had. All of the youth bore testimony of the Spirit they felt and the witness they received that Jesus is the Savior and Redeemer and that the Book of Mormon is another testament of Jesus Christ. They recognized that because of the conditions they faced, they could see how Heavenly Father strengthened them and gave them the ability to carry on with their celebration. They learned that they could do far more than they ever thought possible and do it joyfully.

 I've heard Megan's words echo in my mind quite a bit the past couple of months. Life is magnificent, but sometimes living hurts. And have you ever noticed that just when you think you've figured out some of the answers, the questions change? Or the challenge gets bigger?

Why does it seem so hard to follow through on those flashes of inspiration and promptings I receive from the Holy Spirit? Through prayer and study I've discovered answers to questions and greater insight into principles of the gospel that have helped me make sense of recent challenges. For instance, I came across a wonderful article by Wallace Goddard titled, "A Loving Perspective on Difficult Children" that I knew would help me understand and communicate better not only with my grandchildren, but with several adults in my life. Brother Goddard used a phrase that did more than light a bulb over my head. His "Irritation is an invitation" shot off fireworks in my brain. Thoughts and ideas that had been floating around began to fit together. But there was still something missing.

In seminary, we recently studied the book of Mosiah in the Book of Mormon: Another Testament of Jesus Christ. We compared the experiences of the people of King Limhi and the people of Alma. Both groups of people were descendants of the people who followed Zeniff from the land of Zarahemla back to the land of Nephi. Both groups ended up in bondage to the Lamanites and experienced great hardship and burdens. Both groups were eventually delivered from the bondage by the Lord. But their experiences also had some great differences. 

The people of Limhi had initially rejected the words of the Lord given through Abinidi and Alma. They stood by as Abinidi was burned to death and Alma was hunted. Only when they began to recognize that Abinidi's prophecies had been fulfilled, did they begin to change their attitude and repent. The Lord was slow to hear their prayers because of their iniquities, but He did hear them, and He began to soften the hearts of the Lamanites and the people began to "prosper by degrees". Eventually, Gideon came up with a plan and the Lord strengthened the people to carry out a plan of escape. 

The people of Alma sought him out and found him near the Waters of Mormon. They risked their lives to listen to him preach the truths of the gospel and to be baptized. They received warning when wicked King Noah discovered their whereabouts and they were lead safely to the land of Helam where they began to prosper. But then in Mosiah 23:21, 23 we read: 
Nevertheless that Lord seeth fit to chasten his people; yea, he trieth their patience and their faith...For behold, I will show unto you that they were brought into bondage, and none could deliver them but the Lord their God, yea, even the God of Abraham and Isaac and of Jacob.
While I thought I understood in my heart what the Lord is trying to teach in this account, I couldn't think of the words needed to answer the question I knew my students would ask : But they were obedient and making good choices. They were good people, so why did bad things happen to them? Why does the Lord see fit to reprimand people when they are being good?

Then I came to a quote in the lesson that added the missing piece to my puzzle:
“The word chasten comes from the Latin castus,meaning ‘chaste or pure,’ and chasten means ‘to purify’ [see Merriam-Webster’s Collegiate Dictionary,11th ed. (2003), “chasten”]” (Lynn G. Robbins, “The Righteous Judge,” Ensign or Liahona, Nov. 2016, 97).
All this time I had been looking at "chasten" as a reprimand or lecture or punishment. But purification - now it all made sense to me. When my trainer at the gym sees that I have progressed as far as I can physically with the exercise routine he had set up, he adds new challenges and pushes me to go faster, lift more weight, etc. He wants to help me increase my fitness, so he makes the workout more difficult. The Lord saw that the people of Alma were ready to grow. As a result, they bore their burdens with grace and humility. They prayed for deliverance. Because of their righteousness, the Lord answered right away and strengthened them to be able to bear their burdens until such a time as He saw fit to deliver them out of the hands of their captors.

The Lord delivered both groups of people from their bondage. The main difference is that the people of Alma saw their trial, or irritation, as an opportunity to submit their will to the Lord and remained steadfast and immovable despite the persecution.

So, I made it my goal to stop and think when I feel irritated by circumstances or the actions of others and ponder the invitation I am being given to grow spiritually and to become more like the Savior as He purifies me. For some reason I feel like more situations than ever have cropped up to challenge my desire to do and be a better person. Sometimes I manage to recognize them and navigate through successfully, but more often than not, I find myself distracted or focused on other things and I trip, stumble, and even fall flat on my face.

Oh, how grateful I am for Jesus Christ's Atonement - the one and only way I can be strengthened enough to get up, find my bearings, and continue moving forward. I can let go of irritation and let it become an invitation to grow, to change, and to humbly submit myself to the Lord. This does not mean I have to tolerate abuse of any kind - please don't misunderstand. It does mean that I can let go of offenses - whether they are intentional or perceived - and I can forgive myself and others and extend love the way the Savior extends His love to all. I can experience happiness and joy amidst the challenges by knowing that it is through those challenges that I will learn who I am: a daughter of a Heavenly King who loves me so much He sent His Only Begotten Son to live, love, serve, suffer, bleed and die, and rise again - opening the way for me to also be redeemed and choose eternal life.

Life is magnificent and the pain is worth it.
hugs~












Sep 28, 2017

Life is Magnificent

by Kari Diane Pike

Hello Friends!

Did you miss me?

I have most certainly missed you.

I love sharing thoughts and inspirations and learning from your comments. But life happens. I saw my podiatrist, cardiologist, oncologist, dermatologist, optometrist, and gastroenterologist, and child number seven married the man of her dreams, all in the short six to eight weeks since I last posted here. I reached a goal to ride a distance of fifteen miles on my bike, shed nearly thirty pounds, and my blood work results came back better than they have been in years. There has been no progression in my M.G.U.S. and my heart is full of gratitude. Yep, we've been crazy, busy, happy.

During all of this craziness, an experience of a four-year-old grandson helped keep me grateful and grounded:

Mom: Time to get your jammies on and get ready for bed.
Four-year-old: Wait. What? But I want to have dessert.
Mom: It's too late for dessert. It's night time. You need to go to bed.
Four-year-old: Humph. No fair. Jesus ruins all my plans.
Mom: Did you say Jesus ruins all your plans?
Four-year-old: Yes. He ruins all my plans.
Mom: What do you mean by that? Why would you say that?
Four-year-old: Well, you told me that Jesus made the whole earth and He made the day and the night. And you said that since it's night we have to go to bed and I don't get dessert. So He ruined all my plans. 
Mom: 😲

I've pondered on this little discussion for weeks. Part of me is in awe of this little man's reasoning skills. Another part of me laughs out loud when I think about the future parenting adventures that lie ahead for his lucky mom and dad. Deeper thought reminds me that, like our little grandson, there have been many occasions when I've been unable to comprehend why the Lord asks certain things of me. I get a plan in my head, pray about it, set goals, and start putting those goals into action only to run up against what I perceive to be road blocks. And sometimes I wondered, "Why did You ruin all my plans?" or "Why did I feel prompted to make this choice only to have everything fall apart?"

In 2009 we earnestly prayed about moving our family to Utah where my husband had been working for nearly a year. Let me emphasize that word "earnestly". We wanted our family to be together, but we truly wanted to make the best choice and accept the Lord's will. We received a miraculous confirmation to our prayers and decision and used every last penny to relocate. More tender mercies paved the way for us to find a lovely home in an incredible neighborhood. We had no doubt that the Lord had guided our steps all along the way. Until things started to fall apart.

We lost our renters soon after the move and eight months later lost our home in Arizona that held thirteen years of precious memories. Well, "okay", we said. We love it here in Utah and we'll start over. Our landlords had given us a lease with an option to buy, and we had come to love Utah county. We could get over that little bump. We didn't see the hairpin turn up ahead.

A year later, downturn in the economy caught up with Utah and my husband was laid off from his job as a civil engineer. We used the money we had saved for a down payment to get us through six months of unemployment. Our landlord kindly encouraged us to stay in the house until school let out for the summer, at which point they moved back to Utah and we - two adults, three teenagers, a cat, a dog, and a parakeet - moved into our little tent trailer and camped in my sister-in-law's driveway.

The first few days of "camping" was kind of fun. Our two families cooked together and hung out on the porch and played night games. Even having only one bathroom available for eight people worked out because the Texaco station down the street opened at 6:00 a.m. "House" cleaning took less than thirty minutes. What a great adventure! Until it wasn't.

The violent windstorms that whip out of the canyons of Utah county are scary enough when you live in a sturdy house with a strong foundation. The rain and hail and flying debris accompanied by micro bursts of sixty to eighty-mile-per-hour winds are down right terrifying in a tent trailer. I broke down that night. I learned what it means to "cry unto the Lord". Why, oh why, had things turned out so differently than we expected? Had I failed to listen to His will? Were we supposed to stay in Arizona? Had I put my own desires in place and made the wrong choices?

I begged for protection for my family. I pleaded for peace of mind. I cried for mercy.

And then it was quiet.

Oh, the storm outside our canvas walls raged on. But in my heart and in our little home on wheels, I felt love. The thought that grew in my mind:

Just because things didn't turn out the way you expected doesn't mean you made the wrong choice. You are not being punished. You will discover great blessings. Do you think that things worked out for the early pioneers they way they anticipated? Do you think they expected drought and crickets and nearly starving to death? Did they do the wrong thing? No! They followed the counsel of the Lord. They learned. They grew. They endured. And look at the legacy they left for you and others. Laman and Lemuel murmured because they didn't understand the mind of the Lord. They refused to try. Remember what you learned before about being prepared to receive blessings? You are being prepared. Don't be afraid. Faith endures.
Six years have passed since that storm raged. I never imagined we would be where we are today. I can honestly say I count my blessings every night and thank Heavenly Father for "ruining my plans" because the life with which He has blessed me and continues to bless me is far more magnificent than I could ever dream.

Hugs~
 
Two families tied together through the blessings of eternal marriage. I love being connected to all of these amazing people!










May 13, 2017

Sponges

              Have you ever thought about sponges? Natural sponges go way back in history. Mentioned in Old Testament, Jesus on the cross, pilgrims on the Mayflower had them, pioneers carried them across the plains, they’re used in many societies, old and recent. Natural sponges are commercially harvested in only two places on earth; Greece, and Tarpon Springs, Florida.

                     When Greek immigrants moved to western Florida, they brought sponge diving skills and heritage with them. They sent their sons into the Gulf of Mexico to explore, and were delighted to find sponge beds. A community was established.

                  Sponge harvesting process is interesting. Divers, young men ages 18-24,  wear weighted underwater suits with trailing air hoses, connected to compressors on the sponge boats. They leave all that’s familiar and descend into foreign and often hostile regions. 30 -145 feet deep in the Gulf of Mexico. At that depth, there is very little light, and of course, no air. They stay underwater until their harvest bags are full, returning to the boats over and over, 5-8 hours a day. The small boats stay out in the Gulf  far from shore, several weeks at a time. The divers drag long net bags, and carry rakes with them. The rakes have 4 tines five inches long, which are used to both measure and harvest mature sponges. As they walk along the sea bottom, they pop off sponges and pack them into the long bags that trail behind them. The sponges leave behind micro particles, which then grow into new sponge colonies.

             At this point, the sponges are unappealing, and almost unrecognizable. They are covered in thick black slimy skin, like squishy rocks. Back on the boat, they are dumped out of the nets and piled two deep on the boat’s decks. They are turned and tossed to dry in the blistering Florida sun. After a few days, the sponges are beaten and battered to remove the skin, which is now dry and papery.

          Now the sponges are the familiar texture and a dingy yellow, recognizable, but not yet useful. They are soaked in a caustic solution to remove sand, small shrimp, other contaminants.  They are strung like beads on a necklace and draped high above the boat's decks. After several weeks, the boat is full and returns to shore. There the sponges are clipped, graded and sold for many uses.

              If harvested and put through the process, and cared for, sponges can last many years, even generations.  If they are not harvested, they are not good for much. They will eventually die and decay. Even sea creatures will not eat them.
We are much like the natural sponges. We are content to sit in the familiar darkness, stuck firmly to our favorite rocks, where not much is required of us.   The Lord created the lowly sponges to be used and useful. He wants us to be alive, vibrant, bright, strong and of use in his kingdom.

               To do that, we must be individually gathered and brought into the light, and go through a refining process. The process of becoming all we are meant to be  is not easy. The sponges probably don’t like their process, either. We humans often grumble about leaving our favorite spot in the comfortable darkness. The sponges are not fond of being hauled out of their environment. They don’t adjust well to the piercing hot sun which causes them to die on some level. They likely protest shedding their slimy skin, a part of them they probably thought was important, but actually prevented them from becoming clean and capable and useful. Do we balk when called upon to give up our favorite sins, or lazy habits? Do we mutter when asked to serve? The scriptures refer to putting off the natural man --- is that similar to the sponges’ gooey skin, holding them back from all they could become?

We humans don’t enjoy trial, work, stress, illness, problems, sorrow, or temptation. It’s way easier to sit in the darkness, where so little is required. Sponges are meant to reach their potential, and so are we.

                  Natural sponges can last many years, and the only care they require is to be thoroughly rinsed off and left to dry between uses. Like the sponges, if we serve where needed, and rinse off sins and contaminants as they arise, taking time to dry and regroup between challenges, we can be available to help wherever we are needed in the Lord’s kingdom.

           As we go along the path called life, we must guard against the temptation to judge others. We are all at different stages of the process. Like the sponges, some are still anchored in darkness, unaware of the brilliant light available. Others are recently scooped into the gospel net, unsure of that happens next, or what is expected of them. We all know Saints who are crusty, and others who happily soak up all they can. Some may  be half dried, others basking in the hot sun, others rather flakey. Some of us need a through rinsing, some are already clean and productive, a few almost worn out in service. Some feel we want to sit on the shelf a while, others feel decidedly wrung out. 


           Living the gospel requires effort and some sacrifice.  Joseph Smith explained the important relationship between sacrifice and faith thusly, “ A religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things never has the power sufficient to produce the faith necessary to life and salvation.” We humans tend to be a lazy bunch, but in our hearts, we know effort is required. Deep down, we know we must DO something, even if we don’t much feel like it. 

Feb 4, 2017

What's Your Favorite Tree?

What’s your favorite tree?

Scientists estimate about 100,000 tree species on the earth, most of which grow in tropical regions. They say the number of trees worldwide might total twenty-five per cent of all living plant species. So, which is your favorite?

When I was a child in western New York, our back yard boasted a sweeping horse chestnut tree. While the kids in the neighborhood cherished the spiny chestnuts for weaponry in never-ending battles, I enjoyed climbing its wide branches. So sturdy they barely moved in a stiff breeze, they were a great spot to take a book and read on a summery day.

Our family uprooted when I was ten, moving to the Deep South. Our new yard had more than  two hundred slash pines. They’re ideal for making telephone poles and wood pulp, but they couldn’t withstand that first winter's ice storm. When more than two inches of ice coated our world like crystal, over seventy slash pines crashed down in the night. “Weak roots,” diagnosed the community,wielding chainsaws.  

Dad had a running battle with a weeping willow when we moved to Illinois. The graceful, long branches annoyed him no end. Every spring, he’d be out there with his clippers, trying in vain to coax the willow into a maple tree shape.

A few miles from campus in Hawaii stood a marvelous banyan tree, bigger than a city block, with so many branches twined together, holding it fast to the earth, it was hard to tell where roots and branches began or ended.

Mangoes are the most popular fruit on the planet, and to make a mango, you need a mango tree. I’m fond of crisp apples, too; another tree.

The sight of a tall palm tree against a cloudless blue sky calms my soul; that explains the eight-foot mural in our entryway. Ah, palm trees. Okay, they’re herbs, not trees at all, but I like them.

You have to honor the mangroves in Florida, which take their job very seriously. Along with providing protection and habitat for small critters, their roots filter water along the coasts, while harboring small fishes safely among its roots dipped in the shoreline.

And then there are the giant redwoods of northern California.  Standing fully 365 feet tall, it’d take about fifteen adults, holding hands, to encircle the massive trunks. Yet, their roots are only five to fifteen feet deep. The roots of redwoods intertwine, supporting one another.  If a tree is in crisis, say, from a forest fire or insect infestation, its neighbors can send fluid, nourishment, even a form of antibiotics to heal the affected tree.  In one study, gallons of a harmless dye were put into the roots of one redwood, and color showed up four miles away, in two other trees! Redwoods can live up to four hundred years. We can learn a lot from a redwood.

What’s my favorite tree? Maybe it doesn’t matter; maybe just knowing they stand tall, holding each other up in storm or fire is enough to remind me We're not alone, either. In this world of pain, with division all around us, trees stand unmoved. So shall I.

Dec 8, 2016

Gratitude and Tender Mercies

By Kari Diane Pike

I have never been so grateful to be assigned to speak in church. Sounds crazy, right?!

My previous "every other Thursday" post made mention of how our bishopric called Doug and I while we were out of town and asked us to speak in Sacrament meeting - the Sunday we had planned on driving back to Arizona. I think we took about two seconds to move our travel plans up a day and agree to share some thoughts on the topic of gratitude. I've always felt strongly about supporting and sustaining our church leaders, whom I know are called to their positions by inspiration from Heavenly Father. I had no idea we would be showered with so many tender mercies and blessings of protection as a result of that simple choice.

Had we waited until Sunday to leave Provo, we would have been caught in a terrible snow storm. No snow tires and pulling a trailer in that kind of weather would have been horrendous. Saturday we had sunshine and fluffy clouds from dawn to sunset. Doug and I listened to General Conference messages (when we could get cell service) and scriptures about gratitude and discussed which aspects of gratitude each of us would include in our talks.

An hour or so after we passed through Las Vegas, the Durango's speedometer waggled back and forth, or sometimes quite working all together. At the time, we were in the middle of nowhere because we had decided to avoid the mountains to get through Kingman, Arizona and took the long route over to California and down to I-10. We pulled over a couple of times to fuel up or get something to eat and each time we started back on our journey everything worked again. Until we reached Tonopah.

An hour past sunset and just a little over eighty-four miles from home, Doug checked his rear view mirror. The lights of the car pulling up behind us revealed smoke billowing up from under our car. Doug pulled to the side of the road as quickly as he could. Holiday traffic roared past us as Doug checked under the hood and then walked around the car and trailer. He couldn't see anything wrong. We didn't see smoke any more, but the acrid smell of burning oil seeped into the car and turned my stomach.

Doug got back in the car and pulled on to the freeway. The smoke returned almost immediately. That's when we spotted the first gas station we had seen for miles and miles. And it was only about two hundred yards off the freeway. Doug drove into the parking lot and found a place where our vehicle and trailer would be out of the way. He pulled out his phone and called our insurance agent and a tow company. We both choked a little (or maybe a lot) when we heard an estimate of $600 - $800 dollars to tow us home, but somehow it didn't seem to matter. Even when the mechanic handed us the final tow bill of $1200, we shrugged our shoulders. Okay, to be completely honest, there may have been some gagging noises and a couple of Facebook rants, but neither of us felt overly upset about the situation.

Doug and I held hands as we watched the tow trucks pull away. When we turned to walk into the house, I looked up at my dear husband in amazement and grinned. "We were so focused on gratitude and recognizing all the tender mercies in this trip, we forgot to get into an argument!"

Doug laughed. We both knew that our past experiences with cars almost always resulted in some kind of disagreement. Fatigue, fear, and worries about money lead to shortened tempers and perceived offenses. But this time was different. It was different because our hearts and minds were focused on gratitude. Gratitude for not breaking down in the middle of nowhere without phone service or a safe place to park. Gratitude for the fact that even though there was smoke, there was no fire (We had burned up the rear differential so bad that the housing for the speedometer had completely melted down. Huh. No wonder the needle waggled!). Gratitude for having put aside emergency funds so that we were able to pay for the tow. Gratitude for lovely weather. And most of all, gratitude for each other.

Needless to say, we had plenty to share when we spoke in church the next day. I find it interesting that in seminary we also happened to be studying John, chapter 9, which teaches us that God can use our adversities to show forth His works and His power. And, as we exercise faith in Jesus Christ, our spiritual vision and understanding become clearer. All of these things together gave me a greater understanding of another challenge that had been plaguing me and another aspect of gratitude to share in my talk.

For the past year, I have struggled with the loss of my voice. About a year ago, I had to quit singing because of the pain it caused, not only to my throat, but to ears of those who had to listen. Even talking takes a tremendous amount of energy. For a long time I felt cheated. I also felt like my worth as a person had diminished. But this lesson in gratitude enlightened my mind and changed my heart. I remembered that as a daughter of God, my worth is inherent. Even though I will always be an "unprofitable servant", I can always be a recipient of the Savior's mercy and grace because He loves me. He knows my heart. My worth doesn't come from my abilities, but from my Father in Heaven. He created me.

After our church services ended, an elderly gentleman reached out to me and shook my hand. With tears in his eyes, he thanked me for sharing my loss and how I learned to find gratitude. He had been struggling with his own losses because of a brain tumor and he hadn't been able to understand why he had lost so much. Because I was able to share my experience he found the peace he had been seeking. Oh, how I love being a witness to how Heavenly Father used my adversity to help someone else. He truly knows us by name and knows our every need. He hears and answers prayers and sometimes we get to be part of that answer.

Life is magnificent. Share the Light!

Hugs~