Art of Communicating - Not Assuming

By Leesa Ostrander

Human communication is the process of sharing messages, both verbal and nonverbal. A few basics about communication from a studious standpoint are: communication needs to make sense, share  xperience, create meaning, and is about the messages sent.

The practice and refining of communication is the art and the skill of being a great communicator. Not everyone is a great communicator. Some people are great at writing, others at controlling anger, and some speaking what they don’t mean.

I am still practicing, all of them.

My current lesson in communicating is not assuming. I assume when I say something it is heard and the other person will react.

The other day my babysitter called and asked what time to come over, she had received a text from my husband that we needed her at 7 pm. I told her 7pm would be good since his flight came in at 7:30 pm. At 6:45 pm she called and asked what time I needed her.

Well, deep pause, 7:00 pm is still a good time.

She was frustrated and said I told her 7:30 pm and now she was going to miss a bar-b-que.

She arrived at 7:00 and said “You’re not ready.”

My response was, “No, but I still need you here.”

The overall evaluation of the situation can be read in a book long saga of where this communication broke down. I did not hear what she was asking in the first phone call, she may have wanted a different response in the second phone call and our third contact had a built in barrier where we were not effective.

This example shows how a small misunderstanding causes frustration and breakdown in the intended message sent. This is also true in writing.

When writing a story, poem, email or note to your child’s teacher the message being sent on the paper still needs to have the basics of communicating. In a story if it is missing one element the reader will become confused and frustrated at not understanding and not knowing necessarily what is missing. If in a query letter the reader will dismiss the letter and move on.

A lesson for the week is improving the art of communication and not assuming that what is said and being received is the same thing. It is more about reading the symbols/words and making sure it is what you want to be understood.

Blessed Bumps in the Road

By Tracy Astle

Just a brief post today. I just got out of the hospital. I'm home recuperating from surgery and find myself contemplating mixed blessings.

At first glance the medical problems I've had of late, culminating with this surgery, may seem like a challenge to be overcome - and they can be rightfully viewed as such. But they can also been seen as a huge blessing. First of all, the thought of enjoying renewed health and strength is wonderful. Secondly, I plan on using my six weeks off work to write a rough draft of my second novel. Without the forced down time from this surgery there's no way I would have time to get a draft done so quickly. So, yay.

I am wondering what bumps you may have encountered in your road that ending up being blessings in other areas of your life. Any silver linings of your life's clouds you'd like to share?

Sprint or Marathon?

by Marsha Ward

Yesterday I had a great time at our church's Memorial Day Barbecue. It was a reminder that, from time to time, writers need to come up for air and socialize a bit. Not too often, mind you, or you'll never get back in the writing groove, but occasionally.

When I got home, I did a bit of "other work,"* then decided it was time to finish off the scene I began a couple of days ago.

I recently created a Facebook Group specifically for writers: those who want a companion egging them on during a sprint (short) writing burst, or a fellow-writer to help with the endurance trial of a marathon (long) writing session.

I'll admit that the idea of a place to call on other writers for fellowship during writing isn't original with me. I borrowed it from Tristi Pinkston and Karen Hoover. They have a much fancier place, but I like simple and functional. With the new functionality of Facebook Groups, I chose that venue.

If you want to join us, here's the Facebook URL to click on:

https://www.facebook.com/home.php?sk=group_202433609797864

An admin will approve you to join.


*non-writing work

*Inquiring After Truth

                                         
                                                           by Cindy R. Williams

While Mother's Day shopping at Deseret Book, I came across THROUGH HIS EYES - Rethinking What You Believe about Yourself by Virginia H. Pearce. The cover is a lovely pastel blue with a pearl in an oyster shell. I picked it up and read the inside cover and new it was for me.

The blurb began with, "As anyone who has ever cleaned out a closet or a basement can attest, clutter is a reality of life. And it's not just a physical reality. Our minds can become cluttered too, filled with beliefs about everything from our relationship with God to our feelings about our bodies to our housekeeping methods."

I bought the book and upon returning home, handed it to my husband saying, "Here's my Mother's Day present." He smiled and was thrilled that he had finally gotten me something that I really wanted.

I am reading it slowly so that I can ponder the messages and make the much needed changes. The author, Sister Pearce, is the daughter of President Gordan B. Hinckley. If you have ever heard the man speak or read his words -which I am assuming most of you reading this blog have - you know that he always made you aware of your great eternal worth and that there is hope. Sister Peace has the same ability.

Sister Pearce lays the book out in an easy-to-read clean and concise manner. She teaches us the steps to be successful at discarding the lies and half-truths that may be hindering our progress.

I hope to be more of what I am supposed to be here on this earth as I work through this inspiring book. If you decide to check it out, let me know. I would love to hear other inspired stories.