by Kari Diane Pike
The bomb dropped 31 days ago. Not that I'm counting or anything. Well, maybe. Sometimes. Usually. Sigh. On the upside, as each day passes without Doug finding a job, I become more and more aware of the Lord's tender mercies. No matter where I am, He sends me exactly what I need, at the exact time that I need it; even when I had no idea that I needed it. Is that statement any more clear than a bathroom mirror after a hot, steamy shower?
Simple things I used to take for granted, now fill my heart with gratitude. The Lord makes every thing "just enough." As I struggle to make decisions, He sends me just enough "enlightenment" to discern the good from the best. When I feel weak, He sends me just enough strength to carry out my tasks, and avoid temptation. When my child needs a pair of shoes or I run out of milk, I receive just enough resources to fill that need. He sends just enough love to give me hope and peace, and courage to keep going. Sometimes it comes in the sensation of His loving arms around me as I kneel in prayer. At other times, it comes in the form of a tearful smile from someone else I have been able to serve. Now and then, it comes in a loaf of fresh bread baked and delivered by an angel neighbor.
I am also more aware that each time I recognize these gifts, it is because I have chosen to get out of bed, to read my scriptures, to set aside my pride, and to consciously step out of my self and focus on loving and serving. And quite frankly, there are days when it takes everything I have to get out of bed. But it is always enough.
I have enough time to be diligent. I have enough strength to endure. I have enough love to give, and enough courage to face each challenge, each opportunity for growth -- because without those challenges, I cannot grow! I am fascinated by the thought that while I need to be steadfast and immovable, I must not let my heart grow hard. Because I do know that Christ is my Lord and Savior -- that He atoned for my sins and that He lives -- and that He made it possible for me to return to live with Him in the presence of God the Father. Because of that greatest of all gifts, I can be assured that no matter what else happens in this life -- everything is going to be okay. It will all work out. My testimony will be strengthened and my capacity to love and learn will continue to grow. My knowledge and wisdom and compassion will increase through obedience and service. And one day, I will be able to see my Savior face-to-face and know that it is not only enough...but totally worth it.