An Invitation to Grow

by Kari Diane Pike

About three and a half years ago, our youngest son Levi and our niece Megan participated in a cultural celebration to commemorate the dedication of the Gilbert Arizona temple for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Several hundred youth and their leaders rehearsed in dry, asthma-attack-inducing, dusty conditions and then performed as icy rain poured down from the sky. Megan described the event as the most horrible, magnificent experience she had ever had. All of the youth bore testimony of the Spirit they felt and the witness they received that Jesus is the Savior and Redeemer and that the Book of Mormon is another testament of Jesus Christ. They recognized that because of the conditions they faced, they could see how Heavenly Father strengthened them and gave them the ability to carry on with their celebration. They learned that they could do far more than they ever thought possible and do it joyfully.

 I've heard Megan's words echo in my mind quite a bit the past couple of months. Life is magnificent, but sometimes living hurts. And have you ever noticed that just when you think you've figured out some of the answers, the questions change? Or the challenge gets bigger?

Why does it seem so hard to follow through on those flashes of inspiration and promptings I receive from the Holy Spirit? Through prayer and study I've discovered answers to questions and greater insight into principles of the gospel that have helped me make sense of recent challenges. For instance, I came across a wonderful article by Wallace Goddard titled, "A Loving Perspective on Difficult Children" that I knew would help me understand and communicate better not only with my grandchildren, but with several adults in my life. Brother Goddard used a phrase that did more than light a bulb over my head. His "Irritation is an invitation" shot off fireworks in my brain. Thoughts and ideas that had been floating around began to fit together. But there was still something missing.

In seminary, we recently studied the book of Mosiah in the Book of Mormon: Another Testament of Jesus Christ. We compared the experiences of the people of King Limhi and the people of Alma. Both groups of people were descendants of the people who followed Zeniff from the land of Zarahemla back to the land of Nephi. Both groups ended up in bondage to the Lamanites and experienced great hardship and burdens. Both groups were eventually delivered from the bondage by the Lord. But their experiences also had some great differences. 

The people of Limhi had initially rejected the words of the Lord given through Abinidi and Alma. They stood by as Abinidi was burned to death and Alma was hunted. Only when they began to recognize that Abinidi's prophecies had been fulfilled, did they begin to change their attitude and repent. The Lord was slow to hear their prayers because of their iniquities, but He did hear them, and He began to soften the hearts of the Lamanites and the people began to "prosper by degrees". Eventually, Gideon came up with a plan and the Lord strengthened the people to carry out a plan of escape. 

The people of Alma sought him out and found him near the Waters of Mormon. They risked their lives to listen to him preach the truths of the gospel and to be baptized. They received warning when wicked King Noah discovered their whereabouts and they were lead safely to the land of Helam where they began to prosper. But then in Mosiah 23:21, 23 we read: 

Nevertheless that Lord seeth fit to chasten his people; yea, he trieth their patience and their faith...For behold, I will show unto you that they were brought into bondage, and none could deliver them but the Lord their God, yea, even the God of Abraham and Isaac and of Jacob.

While I thought I understood in my heart what the Lord is trying to teach in this account, I couldn't think of the words needed to answer the question I knew my students would ask : But they were obedient and making good choices. They were good people, so why did bad things happen to them? Why does the Lord see fit to reprimand people when they are being good?

Then I came to a quote in the lesson that added the missing piece to my puzzle:

“The word chasten comes from the Latin castus,meaning ‘chaste or pure,’ and chasten means ‘to purify’ [see Merriam-Webster’s Collegiate Dictionary,11th ed. (2003), “chasten”]” (Lynn G. Robbins, “The Righteous Judge,” Ensign or Liahona, Nov. 2016, 97).

All this time I had been looking at "chasten" as a reprimand or lecture or punishment. But purification - now it all made sense to me. When my trainer at the gym sees that I have progressed as far as I can physically with the exercise routine he had set up, he adds new challenges and pushes me to go faster, lift more weight, etc. He wants to help me increase my fitness, so he makes the workout more difficult. The Lord saw that the people of Alma were ready to grow. As a result, they bore their burdens with grace and humility. They prayed for deliverance. Because of their righteousness, the Lord answered right away and strengthened them to be able to bear their burdens until such a time as He saw fit to deliver them out of the hands of their captors.

The Lord delivered both groups of people from their bondage. The main difference is that the people of Alma saw their trial, or irritation, as an opportunity to submit their will to the Lord and remained steadfast and immovable despite the persecution.

So, I made it my goal to stop and think when I feel irritated by circumstances or the actions of others and ponder the invitation I am being given to grow spiritually and to become more like the Savior as He purifies me. For some reason I feel like more situations than ever have cropped up to challenge my desire to do and be a better person. Sometimes I manage to recognize them and navigate through successfully, but more often than not, I find myself distracted or focused on other things and I trip, stumble, and even fall flat on my face.

Oh, how grateful I am for Jesus Christ's Atonement - the one and only way I can be strengthened enough to get up, find my bearings, and continue moving forward. I can let go of irritation and let it become an invitation to grow, to change, and to humbly submit myself to the Lord. This does not mean I have to tolerate abuse of any kind - please don't misunderstand. It does mean that I can let go of offenses - whether they are intentional or perceived - and I can forgive myself and others and extend love the way the Savior extends His love to all. I can experience happiness and joy amidst the challenges by knowing that it is through those challenges that I will learn who I am: a daughter of a Heavenly King who loves me so much He sent His Only Begotten Son to live, love, serve, suffer, bleed and die, and rise again - opening the way for me to also be redeemed and choose eternal life.

Life is magnificent and the pain is worth it.
hugs~

When the Family Gets Together

by Kari Diane Pike

About thirty years ago, my husband's parents came up with a plan for a family reunion every three years. Each of the seven siblings has taken turns as the "event planner" with everyone else pitching in to help make things happen. The location has varied: Mom and Pop's house in Calabasas, CA, Bear Lake in northern Utah, an empty school in Cottonwood, AZ, a beach side campground near Santa Barbara, CA, and even the Redwood forest. Activities have ranged from surfing and swimming to hiking and card playing and the giving and receiving of lots of hugs.

This year marked our tenth such reunion. We returned to Mom's house (Dad has been gone for nine years now) to celebrate "Grandma the Great turns 88".  For the first time in many years, all seven of the Ken and Delores Pike children were able to attend. Even most of the grandchildren and great-grandchildren made the journey from as close as living in the same house to as far away as Anuktuvuk Pass, Alaska in order to celebrate our much beloved matriarch.

Dad Pike's family has a long history of family get-togethers - usually geared around Thanksgiving and Easter. With nine children in that family our numbers regularly fell between 80 and 100 people. This year was no exception. We laughed, talked, body surfed, browsed museums, discovered hermit crabs, sea anemones, and the occasional scorpion, and played games with about 117 links from our family chain. I'm happy to report that only one child wandered off and went missing for a few minutes at the beach and no one got run over.

We can't forget about the food. One night alone, we consumed 18 large Costco pizzas, three watermelons, 7 pineapples, 10 pounds of strawberries, 6 pounds of grapes, a #10 can of mandarin oranges, 4 large bags of Caesar Salad mix- plus croutons, and two entire sheet cakes. On other days, parents and grandparents alike pitched in to feed the masses with countless pb&j sandwiches, hamburgers, hot dogs, granola bars, bagels, cold cereal, french toast and the requisite s'mores.

Our daughter Kati played a video she had created from snatches of old home movies taken over the years. Seeing the smiles and hearing the voices of children now grown and older relatives  who have passed on brought tears to my eyes. My sister-in-law Penni provided stories from the lives of Ken and Del and from each of their parents. We played a family trivia bingo game based on the stories and sang "Love is Spoken Here" and  "A Child's Prayer." Old wounds received healing and love and the hearts of the children truly turned to their fathers as we remembered who we are and why we are here.

Getting together is getting more difficult as our family grows and spreads around the world. Del is the last of her generation still living from her side of the family and only one of Dad Pike's siblings remains. The Pike reunions of days past fell by the way side as the older generation passed away. Some how the baton got dropped. I hope that we never drop this one. Families truly are forever.

Hugs~

The Ultimate Weapon

by Kari Diane Pike

Recent attempts to broaden my reading horizons and (guilty admission here) a search for something to binge on on Netflix because I watched every episode of Gilmore Girls and needed something to tide me over until the new episodes come out, brought my attention to a particular theme common to nearly every genre: the search for the ultimate weapon (like a super soldier) - someone or something to defend and protect from or even destroy the enemy.

They need not look any further. I encountered a real life secret weapon last Sunday. Code name: "Sunbeams". Sunbeams (for those not familiar with vocabulary from The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints - Sunbeams are the children who are three-years-old, turning four) have the ability to enervate even the most experienced adult. They lure the poor patsy in with shy, dimpled smiles and coy giggles.  They peek from behind their parents' backs, wave their chubby fingers, and create a false sense acceptance. Once left alone with their common enemy,  Sunbeams synergize and zero in on their victim's greatest vulnerabilities. They take no prisoners. They paralyze and then suck their prey dry. Except for the tears. Sunbeams leave behind lots of tears. I should know. I was there. Me, a veteran mom with more than thirty-five years and nine plus more children worth of experience.

I knew I was in trouble when one of the four Sunbeams in the class declared: "Don't listen to her. Let's play pretend and I'll be the king and you can be the princesses  and the wizard and she (meaning me) can be the witch because she doesn't talk nice to us."

I had told them I was disappointed in them because they were using their outside voices and not listening to the story. I would have to talk to their parents, I said. They would be sad, I said. I guess I did lay it on a little thick. Plus, I didn't have food. Never  let yourself get trapped with Sunbeams without food or they will turn on you. Really, really fast.

I changed my tactics and we spent the rest of class time singing and playing "Button, Button, Who's Got the Button." Their parent's picked them up at the door. My husband took me to the car where I melted into a puddle of tears.

For some reason, I can't wait to go back. Maybe that's what makes them the ultimate weapon. The enemy actually wants to go back for more. I really do love those Sunbeams. Some days are easier than others. You can bet I will be better prepared from now on. I will go in armed with prayer, patience, smiles, love, and lots of snacks.

Life is magnificent!

hugs~

When Is It Time?

by Terri Wagner

I have been blessed with the best dogs ever! Each one has brought a joy and delight to me that is truly indescribable. And I take pleasure in knowing through the gospel I will be reunited with the animals that gave such joy to me. I sincerely hope I can communicate better with them because some times I just don't know.

I'm facing an "I just don't know" moment right now.

Several years ago, I had lost my Golden Belle. She died far too young to me although she was 10. A friend called up and said I hate to ask you this but would you consider taking my children's yellow lab? She's less than two and my ex is divorcing wife two and will have to move into an apartment. My kids want Kota to go to a good home.

What could I say?! So the ex brought this beautiful golden looking lab to my office one afternoon. She seemed sad like she knew something was up. And he seemed heartbroken, that did not gell with what I had been told about his actions toward and in truth there some funny ways that took her years to work through. One was as a simple as she was terrified to come through a slightly ajar door. It literally took me years and it still makes me smile when she bangs on through the door these days.

She sat in the back of my car so sorrowfully. Once I got her home, she and my then-half husky half lab danced around each other in silence, then accepted the new situation.

Cassie left me too early too and it was just Kota for a while until another friend had another lab mix in need of a home. This lab Daisy and Kota are the same age. They adore each other. But Kota has arthritis very badly whereas Daisy is just noticeably less fast than before.

For some time I have been sneaking Daisy out of the house for walks since Kota really cannot any more. But last night she just seem to beg me to take her. So I modified the walk to the back field and let her take her time and rest a lot. It wasn't even a football field worth of a walk. But later on she paid the price for her walk, and I had to give her a stronger pain pill.

So when do you look into those trusting loving eyes and say to yourself it's time. If she could talk would she tell me? Dad wants me to do it this time. I am going to see how she is today, but I am afraid she is more ready than I am ready to let her go over the rainbow bridge

It's a Small World - Part II

by Kari Diane Pike

Shortly after I posted about a couple of "small world moments" and the joy of connecting with people, we received an email from our youngest son Levi, who is serving as a young volunteer in the Moscow Russia Mission.  Part of his letter:

By far the best thing that happened this week is that a less active family that I'll call the Blackwells came to the Branch picnic!!!! Yeah yes booyah hooray и так далее! It's been years since any of them came to ANYTHING
We brought peanut butter cookies (apparently they love peanut butter) to them to say thanks, since the Mom is our registrar (essentially she makes sure we're legal, since you have to do paperwork everytime you're in a new city for more than a few days) and helped us with the emergency transfer.
The Mom didn't come because she was at home taking care of their 1 year old, but the Dad (who was Branch President for 7 years, 7 months, and 7 days and also the 1st baptism in Yaroslavl) came with 3 of his older kids (like 11, 9 and 6 ish). They love soccer, so I spent probably a 20 minutes just playing monkey in the middle with them. I loved it, too. Also, I found out that they know Brother Fishbeck in Arizona! Small world

It turns out that the father of that family was the first baptism in that city and Brother Fishbeck was the missionary who baptized him. The family told Levi how much they loved Elder Fishbeck. Almost four years ago, we moved into the same ward as the Fishbeck family and came to love them too. We passed on the message to Brother Fishbeck and he told us how he thinks about that family often and was sad he didn't have a way to contact them. He was thrilled to be able to get in touch and express his love and concern for them.

When I think about all of the circumstances that happened to put our family in this community at this time and for our son to be in that mission and meet those particular people, I get goosebumps. Looking back, I can see the Lord's hand in all this. There are far too many pieces of the puzzle that had to fit just right for any of this to be mere coincidence. Elder Joseph B. Wirthlin shared something that Pres. Monson once told him. Pres. Monson said:

There is a guiding hand above all things. Often when things happen, it’s not by accident. One day, when we look back at seeming coincidences of our lives, we will realize that perhaps they weren’t so coincidental after all.The Lord knows your trials. He knows your victories. And if you will “trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding [but] In all thy ways acknowledge him, . . . he shall direct thy paths” (Proverbs 3:5–6). (Joseph B. Wirthlin, "Lessons Learned Through the Journey of Life," BYU Speeches, Nov. 7, 1999)

This mother's heart rejoices knowing that our son is right where the Lord needs and wants him right now. Things happen for a reason. I am more determined than ever to think twice before I grumble or whine that things aren't going the way I planned. I learn more and more every day that it's not about me. Life is all about love - loving Heavenly Father and His Son Jesus Christ and loving others. Sometimes that means I find myself taking unexpected detours from the goals and plans I set for myself. And that's okay because Heavenly Father always has something far more interesting and exciting in store. Life is magnificent!

Hugs~

It's a Small World

By Kari Diane Pike

I don't understand how a room or a bus or even an elevator can be filled with people who never speak a word to each other. This may simply come from my own need to express myself with words, but I find the silence very awkward. My children have been embarrassed on more than one occasion by their mother talking to the stranger next to them in line or sitting in an auditorium. Experience has taught me that if the right questions are asked, two people can nearly always find a connection. Finding that connection breaks down barriers and can lead not only to new friends, but even help us reconnect with old friends and long lost relatives.

Have you ever heard that theory about the Six Degrees of Separation? Someone even made up a parlor game using the actor Kevin Bacon and how everyone is connected in some way and we can usually make that connection in less than "six degrees" or steps. When you belong to a world-wide organization such as The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, the world becomes even smaller, often connecting people in less than three degrees.

For example, a few years ago, my husband and I took a flight from Salt Lake City to Phoenix. I think I saw at least four other flights from various airlines going out that Sunday night all close to the same time. The terminal was packed. For whatever reason, Doug's ticket allowed him to board first thing. I was stuck at the end of the line. By the time I joined him, Doug was deep in conversation with the young man sharing our row of seats.

He introduced himself as Mike. He looked terribly familiar, yet I knew I had never met him before. He definitely reminded me of someone else we knew. We learned that Mike was headed back east to interview for a PhD program in physics. We also learned that that made him the favorite grandson because his grandmother always wanted a physicist in the family. He said he was from Bountiful, Utah and had ten siblings. Most of them had advanced degrees and as we learned more about this family, Doug said,

"Do you mind me asking what your father does for a living that your family can afford the education to earn all of those advanced degrees?"

Mike grinned. "Oh, my dad is a cardiologist."

Without so much as a glance at each other, Doug and I both exclaimed, "You're a Muhlstein! And your uncle's name is Randy and your dad's name is Brent!"

Mike's sat back in his seat and his eyes opened wide. "How do you know my name and how do you know my family?"

Doug explained that while we were dating, Brent and Randy were two of Doug's roommates at Brigham Young University. Mike looked just like his dad and his uncle. Plus, Good Housekeeping magazine had published an article about Mike's dad and their family. Although we had lost touch, we read about their travels and challenges as a large family with a father who had a demanding and successful career.

Part two of that story happened two years later. While babysitting for my nephew in Phoenix, two sister missionaries knocked on the door. One of the name tags read "Sister Muhlstein>" Yep. You got it. She was Mike's sister.

I'm sharing this story because I have learned the value of reaching out to others and trying to make connections. This past week, I checked into the surgical waiting area at Primary Children's Hospital while our granddaughter had surgery on her hip. Other parents and grandparents huddled in family groups around the room. As I looked for a place to sit, a few acknowledged my greeting with a brief nod or a tired half-smile. Most of them seemed uncomfortable when I made eye contact. I eventually found a seat across from the receptionist's desk. Soon after, a woman about ten years younger than myself, and her late-teen or early twenty-something son sat down near by. Her name tag told me that his name was Nathan. A few minutes later, the Nathan left with the nurse.

I read on my Kindle, and studied for next week's seminary lesson. An hour crawled by. No one said a word. I thought about the circumstances that would necessitate their presence and I knew it had to be stressful. The mom fidgeted and kept glancing at her watch. I wanted to help her feel less anxious.  I said a little prayer and felt impressed to just start talking. Find the connection. Be her friend.

"Do you ever wonder why time seems to drag on forever when we need it to go fast, but when we really need a lot of time, it flies by?"

Nathan's mom gave me a startled look as if thinking, "Are you talking to me?" She smiled and her stiff shoulders relaxed a bit. "I know, right! Waiting is never easy. My son was diagnosed with leukemia three years ago and he's having his last treatment today and they are removing his port. It wasn't supposed to take this long."

I learned that they lived in Pocatello, Idaho. They had made the three hour drive multiple times every month in order for Nathan to receive the best possible care. Well, there was a small connection. I lived in Pocatello when I was two years old. I also had a friend who had moved her family there. "I know Pocatello is a good sized town, but would you happen to know Lana Borgalthaus?"

Before Lana's name was even completely out of my mouth, Nathan's mom's face lit up. "Oh yes! She is the person who finally diagnosed Nathan and got us the help we needed to get him better. I love her!

We chatted for over an hour, sharing our family struggles with medical complications and our testimonies of God's love and tender mercies. I wish I had asked her her first name. We left the waiting room within minutes of each other and I felt like I had made another wonderful friend.

I've been pondering on the many ways we are all connected. I suppose I could dig really deep and study quantum physics and learn all the formulae to show those connections, but because I know who I am and why I am here, I don't need to. All I need to know is that I am a child of God who loves me... and so are you...and you...and you. Because we are all connected, we can lift one another's burdens and help each other on this mortal journey. The connections we build are the only thing we take with us to the next life.

So dear friends, next time you find yourself in that silent room, reach out and make a connection. I promise you won't regret it. You might even find it fun. Plus, I would love to hear about it.

Life is magnificent!
hugs~

A Gift of the Spirit

by Kari Diane Pike

What would you do if you knew that you could not fail?

I asked my seminary class that question last year. I noticed several pairs of eyes open wide. Wheels started turning. Sleepy heads lifted up off the tables. Faces lit up.

"I'd retake my English final."

"I'd start up a business."

"I'd apply to medical school and become a neurologist."

I wanted to bottle up the energy that snapped and crackled in the room. A warm, tingly feeling reminded me of a time I stood on the sidelines of a soccer field in Flagstaff, Arizona, my trusty umbrella shading me from the intense July sun. A magnificent thunderhead mushroomed up from the horizon and before I knew it, an army of fierce looking cloud warriors had joined him, flashing their lightening swords behind their backs.

I pointed out the weather front to my husband. He took his eyes off the game and glanced around for a moment before looking at his watch. No worries. Only ten minutes left to the game. Besides, the sun shone bright above us and miles of blue sky still separated us from the storm. All was well.

That's when I felt it. Every hair on my arms stood straight up and my body tingled from the tips of my toes to the crown of my head. Before I could even process what that meant, a blinding flash of light accompanied by a deafening crack hit the fence surrounding the field. A nanosecond of stunned silence evaporated into shouts as players and parents yelled out to each other and sprinted to their cars for safety, leaving behind a ghost town of shade canopies and tipped-over camp chairs.

The feeling in our seminary class was every bit as powerful, but in a much different way. The lightening made my hairs stand on end, but the result was chaos and fear. The energy I felt when the Holy Spirit testified truth to our class-the truth that Heavenly Father loves us and sent us here to succeed-brought us hope and strength and determination to act.The witness we received that morning reminded us of who we are and why we are here. While players and patrons scattered, our class became more unified. While I have no desire to be that close to lightening ever again, I seek the closeness and the witness of the Spirit every single day.

This morning I listened to a speech given by Pres. Henry B. Eyring in 2006 called "Gifts of the Spirit for Hard Times." Pres. Eyring testifies that, yes, we can experience the companionship and personal revelation of the Holy Ghost every day if we will live worthy of it. He named three things in particular that help invite the Spirit of the Lord to be with us:

1. Faith in Heavenly Father and His Son Jesus Christ.
2. Be Clean. 
3. Pure Motive. 

The third item, "pure motive" gave me a lot to think about. Why do I pray for the Spirit to help me with my writing and with teaching? Do I seek praise, adoration, and accolades, or do I seek to accomplish the will of our Father in Heaven? What I have noticed is that when I try to show the students how much knowledge I have, class time fails miserably. When I suppress my selfish desires and ask and listen to God's purpose, the students light up. They ask questions and volunteer answers. Love fills the room. 

What would you do if you knew you could not fail? I've asked that question in this forum before, but I've come to see the question from a different perspective. Life is magnificent!

Hugs~ 

Overcoming Fear

by Kari Diane Pike

When I submitted my post two weeks ago, I had no way of knowing that in a few short hours eleven police officers, on duty during a peaceful protest, would be gunned down in the street. I never imagined that something like that would happen in this country in this day and age. Oh, how my heart aches for those officers and their families and friends. And for our country.

The Savior's words in Luke 2,1 where He tells of the signs that will precede His Second Coming, come to my mind:

And there shall be signs in the sun, and in the moon, and in the stars; and upon the earth distress of nations, with perplexity; the sea and the waves roaring; Men's hearts failing them for fear, and for looking after those things which are coming on the earth: for the powers of heaven shall be shaken. (Luke 21:25-26)

One of the primary emotions, fear can create an uncomfortable sense of vulnerability. That discomfort often leads to anger. Anger triggers a surge of energy and creates a sense of control and power. People often see anger as the quickest and easiest way to regain control.

Part of the law of thermodynamics is the law of entropy which states that "a system will always move from a state of order toward a state of disorder." Everything falls down unless one makes the effort to keep it together. It takes work to keep a house clean, a garden weed-free, or a relationship healthy. Anger comes naturally, but since natural law tends toward entropy, when we give in to anger, we find ourselves on a slippery slope, moving from bad to worse. We have to overcome the "natural man/woman" and remember who we are and why we are here.

Elder Russell M. Nelson expressed his thoughts on this topic far better than I ever could.

I know that I am a daughter of a loving Heavenly Father who designed me to be a creator. It's part of my divine heritage. When I find myself in a difficult or uncomfortable situation, instead of letting myself give in to anger, I can look for the lesson to be learned and create joy from the experience. I can't always control the things that happen around or to me, but I can choose how I react to the situation. There have been times when I've felt wholly inadequate to face the task. It's a really scary world. But when I remember what the Savior did for me, I am reminded that even the smallest effort on my part is enough. He will make up for what I lack. Because He loves me. And because He loves me, I can show that love to others. 

Life is magnificent. 

Hugs~

I came across this article by Pres. Gordon B. Hinckley after writing this post. I find it very applicable to our needs today:https://www.lds.org/ensign/1991/06/of-you-it-is-required-to-forgive?lang=eng

Moving Day

By Kari Diane Pike

Moving day. Those two little words have the power to make even the most unflappable person cower in the closet with a year's supply of chocolate, caffeinated drinks, and Cheetos. No matter how happy I am about the circumstances behind relocating, the effort needed to accomplish everything that entails remains the same. That said, some moves are better than others, and certainly when I am happy about moving, there seems to be less pain involved. But still...it's moving day.

Our oldest daughter and her family are also in the process of relocating. I am moving less than 20 or so houses down the street. Our daughter is moving from Wyoming to Anuktuvuk Pass, Alaska. They can't even drive there! So when I catch myself getting whiny about our little hop around the corner, I remember that it could be worse. Then I may or may not open up Facebook and adjust my attitude with my favorite dark chocolate.

The most moves I ever made in one year is five. The longest move I've made was from Kalispell, Montana to Phoenix, Arizona. The fastest move came about the first time we lived in Gilbert, Arizona - the beautiful town in which we now reside. My husband Doug had tried for nearly six months to get a business off the ground, without success. He received a job offer from a company in California and had to decide if he wanted to keep trying to make a go of self-employment or accept the position. While he mulled over the pros and cons we had discussed, I had mom stuff to do. I left to run errands and pick up some much needed groceries to feed the five littles we had at that time.

I lugged a load of groceries in from the garage and Doug called to me from the living room. When I entered the room, I noticed that he had changed out his casual jeans and t-shirt for a pair of dress slacks, white shirt and tie. I also realized that a strange woman sat on a chair across from where Doug sat. Doug stood and walked toward me, gesturing toward the woman and introducing her as a reporter for the Gilbert Independent - the local newspaper.

"Honey, I accepted the job in California. I called and resigned from the Town Council and they sent [the reporter]. The packers will be here tomorrow and the movers will be here the next day."

Yes, we are still married.

I guess the point of sharing these thoughts is to express to you how grateful I am for these experiences. Yes, some moves have been harder than others. I always dread leaving friends and having to find new doctors and someone who can cut my hair (that struggle is real). But every move has given me new friends, new perspectives, and many opportunities for growth.

Kneeling by my bed the other night, I realized that my prayers had become far to focused on me - asking the Lord to help me do this and help me get through that. I stopped mid-thought and I asked,

"Heavenly Father, what can I do for you today?"

A sweet stillness filled the room and the thought came to my mind, "Be kind. Be patient. Love those around you. Be happy. Everything will work out."

So, if you have read this far, thank you. Do you know how wonderful you are? I love you. I believe in you. Life is magnificent.

Squeee~
The realtor just brought us the keys. Moving day just became official!

hugs~

Learning How to Be United In Charity

By Kari D. Pike

Has it really only been two weeks since I wrote my last post? I guess two days of B.Y.U. Women's Conference, a quick trip from Provo to Rexburg, Idaho and back in one day and the drive home back to Gilbert, Arizona the next day, selling our house, putting in an offer on another, a grandson's birthday and a nephew's wedding open house all in the following 7 days might possibly warp my perception of said time. Oh, and I can't forget to squeeze in all the normal stuff like grocery shopping, laundry, home inspections (well, not so normal...), church callings and now this nasty chest cold.

Women's Conference. Where do I begin? The theme "One in Charity" says it all. Each and every lecture that I attended focused on doctrines and principles that taught me how little I truly understand about what charity. Elder Renlund and his sweet wife concluded the conference with this. They reminded the audience that the Lord can use us where ever we are to do His work. The forty something minutes it takes to watch that video are well worth it - even if it means you don't read the rest of this post...honestly, you won't regret watching it! Real charity is not something you give away. It is something you acquire - an attitude - a state of heart and mind as you serve.

Everything I saw and heard expanded on what our Prophet and Apostles taught us in General Conference this past March/April. Our Church leaders called upon us to open our eyes, minds, and hearts to our brothers and sisters around the world who seek refuge from war torn countries. News feeds and social media exploded with opinions about the who, what, where, when, why and how to care for millions of people who are now homeless, hungry, and suffering.

I admit that while my heart ached as I watched news reports of parents burying the starved and broken bodies of their children, I also harbored fear of what might happen to my own family if we allowed so many refugees into our community. Rumors of terrorists hiding among the ranks of the oppressed fed the fear lurking in my thoughts. After all, aren't we supposed to defend our families and freedoms? How do you do both?

I added these concerns to my growing prayer list, intending to study it out more when I returned home from my trip to Utah and Idaho. Until then, I would enjoy visits with family, celebrating our 38th wedding anniversary, graduations, weddings, and BYU fudge and ice cream at the Creamery.

My heart began to change the moment 10,000 voices joined together to sing hymns of praise. Sister Sandra Rogers spoke about Corrie Ten Boom's story "The Hiding Place" and reconciling our beliefs with the hate and anger that comes with suffering and oppression. She said that charity is far more than love or kindness. Unity is to become one in thought, desire, and purpose. "One in charity" is loving God first. Receive the charity offered by the Father and His Son and extend that love to others. Interact with others without being easily provoked. Our covenants teach us how to keep the two great commandments. The best way to help and love others is to put the first commandment first. Those who love the Lord are blessed with all the gifts of the Spirit - including being one with the Lord in charity - and helps us overcome any challenge of the natural man (including fear of what others might do to us). See that you do not judge wrongfully. Then Sister Rogers told the story of the Dutch Potato Project.  "You can talk about it - but you have to do it - to be there - to feel it."

My Women's Conference high stayed with me all the way to Rexburg and back to Arizona, but the full dawn of light didn't happen until  I opened my scriptures to Alma 24 - 26 a few days after I returned home. These chapters in the Book of Mormon tell about the people of Ammon (Anti-Nephi-Lehies) and their conversion to the gospel of Jesus Christ. They covenant to bury their swords and never risk shedding blood again. In fact, they chose to suffer death at the hand of their enemies rather than defend themselves. As the aggression against them escalated, the Lord commanded the prophet Ammon to take the people to the Nephites in Zarahemla to seek asylum. The Nephites not only gave them the land of Jershon but raised an army to defend them from the Lamanites. They treated them like the brothers and sisters in the Lord that they knew they were.

For the first time, I gave serious consideration to what it might have meant to the people in Zarahemla to be asked to take in the people of Ammon. The Anti-Nephi-Lehies had at one time been enemies of the Nephites. They had cause all sorts of problems, including death for the Nephites. Then the Nephites are asked by their king and prophet to take their enemy in and protect them from the very kinds of acts they had participated in before their conversion to the gospel of Jesus Christ. And that's when I got it.

What President Monson and the Apostles have asked of me is no different. We are all brothers and sisters - sons and daughters of a Father in Heaven who loves all of His children. If I let go of fear and focus on what the scriptures and my Church leaders teach me and unite with my brothers and sisters in the Lord, I will witness miracles. I can share light and love, but my motive needs to be charity - expecting nothing in return because I love the Lord and I know all things come from Him. It's time for me to bury my own weapons of war - be they words or feelings of resentment or fear - and help others who are suffering. Speak up. Speak out. Unite with others in charity to defend home and family and religious freedom. The time to serve is now. The time to put away differences is now - to be united in our love of God.

Life is magnificent. Now it's time to help others experience that magnificence.
hugs~