Dealing with the practicalities of dad's death has put me in some weird zone...I can't finish a formed thought before another takes it place. So today here are some of the random thoughts in no particular order that are taking up space in my head today.
Why did President Monson say so much in such a little bit of time? How can I ignore his soft voice asking me (a prophet asking) to please read the Book of Mormon every day? But I just taught that last year in Gospel Doctrine. I like church history better. But a prophet asked me...I can't ignore that.
Is Daisy sick? Has the cancer spread? Is she eating enough? At least I know dad will be there to take her over the rainbow bridge. Who came up with the rainbow bridge? Is Kota ok? Why does my stepmom keep telling me to put her down? She's got arthritis but she still wants to walk, run, comes up and down the stairs. Do I have to worry about this right now? Is leaving Jasper with the stepmom during the week right? Is he ok? Is his cancer progressing?
Do I have to change all the bills to my name? Will I have to pay deposits if I try to change them? (Tears filling my eyes putting in dad's old email account and passwords.) Can I just pay them this month and deal with this later? Hmmm, wow, this is one is already in my name?
School closed because of bad weather? It was just a bad thunderstorm thank goodness. More coming tomorrow? But we are testing. It. Has. To. Be. Done. Breath just breathe.
Wait maybe I can do one of those "read the BOM in a year" where it's already figured out, and I can just follow the formula? Why did the TV dvr conference in two separate places? Why did Family Search send me relatives and then make it so hard to connect them? Where is the Sunday am session? This was ALL of President Monson's talk, not just a piece of it?
I need to get back to school and charge up computers in case something goes wrong. Wait, it doesn't matter if I'm starting the BOM chart on April 5. I can just call it January 1st.
It's Monday I have a whole day to think about my ANWA post. Better check on it. Wait it's Tuesday, we were off Monday due to the bad weather that didn't happen.
Wait I have a talk on the Atonement April 23rd, didn't someone speak on the Atonement and say something about us saying it wrong???
It's Tuesday FHE is tonight, do I have to do anything? Maybe the prophet meant people who haven't read it recently??
That's my life right now. Hope I made you chuckle.
You made me TIRED. Hope things calm down soon, but don't rush it. Grief comes in different sizes.
ReplyDeleteThank you I am slowly getting there.
DeleteOh my heart. Terri, I want to appear at your door and give you a big ole for real hug. So much on your plate. I wish I could carry some of that burden for you. You are a great example to me of faith and grace. and yes...what Deb said. Hugs~
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