by Terri Wagner
Lately, I find myself asking myself do I really need to be doing this? Isn't this just a waste of time? What could I be doing instead? For me the saddest song I ever heard was Wasted Time by the Eagles.
So I resolved early on in my life I would not waste my time. This journey has been interesting. When I was much younger of course I felt I wasted time in high school. I mean really do we need that last year? And what about those first two years in college (btw this is better now)? I worked through college and in the summers...talk about wasting time!!!
Then in my YA years I began to play with my time. I did the serious stuff but made sure I had plenty of time for the play stuff. Ok, sometimes the play stuff took over. Like the time this guy and I played some Nintento game ALL night and we both had to work the next day. Or the play time I spent doing things that had no eternal perspective at all. Or the memorable moment I realized God can't take vacation time...hmmmm!!!!
Then came Might and Magic. I justified that one because I played with a couple and their high school aged son in a misguided attempt to bring the gospel to them. Moving along, then came online games like Farm Town and Castleville. I needed a break from the seriousness of life, right? That was my justification.
I think I'm taking another turn in my life. Suddenly I find myself asking myself you actually feel obligated to continue playing Castleville when you don't even understand the game, it takes way too much time, and you "owe" this online people to "tend" to their castles just to "help" them out? And how many cyber fields can you plow just to "catch" up to all the other people who seem to jump a million levels when the new ones come out? What are you doing? Aren't there better ways to get away from it all?
Then that old devil's advocate says to me. You need a break; it's just for fun; it's helping people; it's relaxing. Then the "new" voice responds, "But wait it's not relaxing...it's a nightmare trying to keep up and move ahead. And I don't even know if these people really exist. I could be tending castles with a computer-generated group of people."
So I've been reevaluating things. I want to help real people I actually know that have real problems that need my help. I want to work on family search indexing more. I want to do my own genealogy. And my dogs are always up for a walk. There are better ways to relax.
I am reminded of what someone once said: As Mormons, our choices are not always good vs. evil, but good vs. better. I'm not putting anyone down that plays any of these games. Lives change; circumstances change. Obviously I'm changing.
So I guess I should go post a notice in FB that I'm dropping out of the online gaming world for a while. I need to set some priorities and choose the better part for my life for right now.
Someday when appropriate I may come back to online gaming. But for now, I'm going to spend time with the next generation.