Sep 9, 2007

Life Changes Around Us

by Marsha Ward

Last night I heard that noted tenor Luciano Pavarotti died this week. Today, an email informed me that Madeleine L'Engle, author of A Wrinkle in Time, also passed away this week. I'm sure other, less well-known people have gone to their reward this week, but I haven't checked the news to see. Life, and death, goes on all the time.

So it is with adversity. It is a constant part of our lives, to one degree or another. Sometimes we have to deal with huge adversities and feel like we're drowning. Sometimes they are not so big, and we seem to tread water quite well.

Many of you know that I've been battling with my eyes this year. Each eye has had to heal from a significant corneal scratch. Now I have blurred vision and a sensitivity to light, especially fluorescent bulbs. It's not unusual to see me wearing sunglasses in church.

On Wednesday, I will get the news whether or not I officially have diabetes. Since this may be tied to my eye problems, I actually look forward to knowing. Once the determination is made, I can go forward with increased awareness of my medical status, and, incidentally, update my eye doctor. This can only be good, since my glasses no longer work properly, which plays hob with my piano-playing calling. I don't know if I'll be able to play the organ when winter comes and the summer organist goes home. It will be quite difficult unless my glasses prescription gets changed before then.

The problem is that I see best for close work with my left eye at the bottom of my no-line glasses, while the top of the right lens works better with the right eye. Can you see why I just close the right eye much of the time? That does get old, though.

Not being able to see properly has been driving me crazy. The left eye is the "good" one. It stays pretty near normal most of the time. The right seems to like fuzzyville. However, sometimes it gets much better, almost normal, then something I eat or do or encounter in the air sends it back to poor vision.

Wish me luck, and the best medical care I can obtain so I can make it past this drowning adversity and into the realm of treading water once again. Thanks.


  1. Marsha, I feel for you. You've had health, body, and eye trouble far beyond mine, but I've had a tiny share. I often find myself reading with only one eye (usually the right one that has had only one surgery instead of the left one that had two) and my focus slips in and out. For short spurts that surprise me, I can read even fine print without glasses, but just as ofen I have to use magnifiers and clear the blurring with strained focus on each word. It makes for slow reading, but I'm so grateful that I can still see. I believe you feel the same way.

    Yes, it's much better to have all our bodily parts work right. We've all been blessed with amazing bodies, and when they function correctly, the're especially fantastic. Even when parts get out of whack, our bodies try to compensate in some way or other.

    I may be a bit odd (but then I suppose in some way or other we all seem a bit odd, which we call individuality) but I've found when I vocally. or at keast mentally, praise my body and/or each body part for what it does, and thank it for all these years of faithful service, my amazing body seems to respond with a little less pain, a little better hearing, seeing, and stamina. Whether it's imagination or not, it makes me happier, so I promise my body I'll treat it better. That promise is hard to keep because old habits die hard, still it's my goal.

    Marsha, I wish you, and everybody else, lots of luck, the best medical care, and the most positive outlook. Keep on treading. It's worth it.

  2. Marsha,

    It's bad enough struggling with my changing eyesight since I turned 40 (now going on 50), I can only imagine how frustrated your vision problems must be for you--especially for someone who's life so revovles around reading and writing! You will be in my prayers for the best medical care available!

  3. Marsha, I'm convinced that the worst place to be is waiting to hear what you have. Once you know, as you said, you can "get on with it." I wish you the best. Putting a name on this adversity will give you a handle, literally, to hold on to and swing the thing around to your ability to take care of it. My best, Rene

  4. From someone who has had an ongoing mystery illness for count them five long years, you have my deepest sympathy and prayers. I hope they find an answer. I could be wrong but it seems to me right now knowning the answer is easier to cope with than feeling the strain of constant probing and poking only to be told, well it's not this!!!

  5. Marsha, you are in my thoughts and prayers and best wishes. I am asking for angels to attend you and your doctors. I remember being ill once and having the doctor examine me and say, "I can't find a "dang" thing wrong with you." His language was a little more colorful than that....and he was LDS! It was a challenging time. You are an amazing woman my friend. Keep treading! I know there's a life line there somewhere.

  6. Marsha,

    I hope you find the news that will best help you. It is difficult not knowing. I'm sorry to hear about your eye problems and the adversity it is causing you. I hope the very best for you!


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