Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Oh Where, Oh Where did You Go???

by Kirsten Millsap

As mentioned in my previous post, I am in charge of our stake's Christmas concert event. I also mentioned that when I work on these concerts, my fingers seem to fly over my keyboard in a magical dance of inspired writing. This year...not so much. Instead of dancing over the keys like a prima ballerina, my hands seem to have two left feet...or...all thumbs.

What's the deal? Where did my guide go? I pray every morning for help and inspiration, and to my knowledge there are no unresolved issues, or...a-hem...sins to confess (whether commission or omission) So why am I suddenly alone? I feel like everything I pull out of me is a tug-o-war, and it's getting frustrating. I am no longer having fun. So I had a little "Chat" the other day while in the car (the best prayer place I know) and I think I have finally figured out what is going on...

I have not been left alone--no--the spirit is still there. What has changed, is Heavenly Father wants me to now walk on my own, and trust in the gifts He has given me. Wow. He trusts me!What a concept! I use the skills He blessed me with, and He gets to run around the universe fixing everything that needs fixing. I guess if He trusts me...I can trust me too.

Now, if only I knew for sure that He will stop me before I do something stupid...like say...misquote scripture. But with my luck, it may just be the biggest lesson I would ever be forced to learn...too bad it would be in front of 2000 people in my stake.

Ok. Now that I have sufficiently psyched myself out, I think I miss the days of hand-holding...

4 comments:

  1. So true! I went through the same thing as we were purchasing a new car. After much deliberation and prayer, I realized that Heavenly Father trusts my judgement, and whatever car I choose is good with Him.

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  2. Thanks for the insight. It is good to be reminded that we can be trusted.

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  3. Oh yes those moments when Heavenly Father says you can do this are both exhilerating and terrifying. Sorta like a child beginning to walk, ride a bike, go to school....

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  4. Wonderful insight, Kirsten! Loved reading this...and I will be pondering it all day long!

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