By Stacy Johnson
Remember this blog post from November 2nd? I told you I would get back to you and I thought this was cute. My 13 year old son is cute and adorable if I do say so myself and his argument was clever, yet comical to me. It is a clear expression of his way of thinking and his personality. I wish you knew him like I did and I hope you find this funny.
This is his roughdraft. It got some editing before the final draft was turned in, but we haven't gotten it back from the teacher yet and it is handwritten so there is no copy available. I will post my comments in red, his essay in black, because I have to have the last word you know:
Why your reasons aren't good enough, Mom
By Drew Johnson
There aren't many good reasons to why you make me play the piano and some of yours were illogical and unfair. (Contrary, son, I am rarely illogical or unfair, that's why I'm the mom.)
You said I needed to be a good reader. But, I already am. I read everyday and have almost a tenth grade reading level in the 7th grade. (Yes, but wouldn't you rather have a college or higher reading level? I'm just saying you could be better)
I know I need to develop my talents, but I'm no good at playing the piano so there is no talent. And, because of the time piano takes, it wastes time for my real talents. (Isn't it funny that I think you are so incredibly talented at the piano and you think you aren't? I will not argue the point that you have many wonderful gifts and talents, I just want you to see that playing the piano is one of them.)
If you love to hear piano music in the morning, then let someone else do it. There are three other kids who play and so they can cheer you up. You wake us up so you're never asleep for us to wake you to our playing. (You misunderstood me, I enjoy hearing you practice in the morning, not being awaken by the sound of you playing.)
You do love to torture me, that is for sure. You know I'd do most anything to be able to quit piano lessons, I hate playing. (hee hee)
I may go to a foreign country on my mission, but I can almost play the hymns now. If I can't play them on the piano, we can sing to my bell playing. (Yeah, sure, cause bells are readily available in sacrament meeting, give me a break.)
If you are just going to spend your money, spend it on someone that wants to play. Marly really wants to play the piano, spend it on her. (Marly is my 15 year old who sits down and plays the piano just because she wants to and she enjoys it without taking anymore lessons, besides they would have to be at 9pm in order to fit them into her schedule.)
The piano is never used in a jazz or marching band and that is all I play in. Yes, I want to be a great percussionist, but I will never have to play the piano. (Oh, ye inexperienced child, piano is an important part of jazz band, it is unfortunate that there is nobody good enough at your school to be in the jazz band that plays the piano. You may be that person in the future. I have some great links to some incredible jazz bands that have piano, just ask me to show you.)
There aren't any girls I know that like it. Every girl I tell thinks it is funny or stupid that I play. Anyway, I'm amazingly handsome so I don't really need the piano. (Why yes, you are amazingly handsome, but you can't take the opinion of middle school girls, they don't know anything. Wait till high school or college and then argue this point with me.)
See, he is amazingly handsome!
There are no gangs in Queen Creek. Plus, I participate in sports like track, football, basketball, baseball, and I'm in scouts so there's no leftover room to join a gang right now. (OK, I might have no reason to think you are going to join a gang, but I needed one more reason.)